Gar smiles a little at the reassurances, the touches.

"Just... what if it's just difficult again and I'm sick and then you'd be having to do so much more than you already do because I could barely take care of myself last time Tommy."

And growing a life inside of you and raising a tiny human are still terrifying and Gar still feels like he's never not afraid something will happen.

"I want another one too. I'm just... scared I'd fail you and our kids... our family. And you'll tell me I won't and there's no way but it doesn't make me not afraid of it."