Oh. His heart clenches with the way Huaisang looks at him, shy and soft and vulnerable, and he's leaning in closer before he even realizes. He just barely manages to stop himself before he kisses him, hovering just a few inches away from his lips.
"I want to kiss you," he murmurs. "I want to make you feel good, A-Sang, but I do not want to go where such touch is not welcome. If you allow me - is there anywhere you do not want me to touch?"
Maybe his answer to that question won't always be the same, Huaisang doesn't have any way of knowing really. But he lifts his head to kiss him, quick and soft before he answers.
"Today as long as you see me as a man you can touch me anywhere," he murmurs, the other understands him, respects him and Huaisang feels safe right now. There's a moment of hesitation and then he gently takes the other's wrist and guides his hand back to his inner thigh, breathing getting heavier with nerves, with anticipation.
He sighs into the kiss, barely resisting the urge to chase after him to brush their lips together again. But he wants Huaisang's answer more, so he waits, swallowing roughly when he gets it. It is a heady thing, to be trusted this much, and he lets himself feel the weight of it for a long moment before he revels in it.
His touch is firmer this time, when Huaisang guides him back, more purposeful as he strokes up the inside of his thigh.
"Then today I will touch you everywhere, and tomorrow I will ask you the same question, understanding the answer may be different."
His fingers brush against Huaisang's folds, running over them by feel alone, since he can't take his eyes away from the other's face.
"And I will do the same the day after that, and the day after that, and every day for as long as you will have me."
There's something in hearing that that thrills Huaisang and makes him feel complete in a way he struggles to find daily. He feels accepted and respected. His breath catches as the other's hand moves along his thigh, the anticipating making him ache for more of that touch.
Then those fingers find the soft folds and Huaisang moans softly, his eyes closing for a moment as he allows the pleasure of being touched by another -- by Xichen -- to rush over him.
There's a smile as Huaisang looks at the other, breathing out shakily.
Huaisang's smile pulls one almost automatically from him, and he can't help but lean down to kiss him. His heart aches, a little, that this is something that Huaisang has to thank him for - that he knows what the reaction of most others would be, that it is another way that Huaisang has had to hide.
"Thank you," he murmurs. "For trusting me with this. I have wanted you for a very long time."
He kisses him again, just the barest brush of his lips against Huaisang's, and then he drags them over his chin and down the underside of his jaw, planting small kisses all along the line of his throat. At the same time, his hand gently parts Huaisang's folds so he can explore deeper, fingertips gentle over the wet heat of him until they find his clit and press with a little more intention.
Huaisang smiles more because how can he not, the knowledge that Xichen has wanted him and that the truth didn't make him stop wanting him or vice versa if Xichen hadn't and this had made him want... It's easy to trust Xichen -- he always had. He lifts into the kiss even as light as it is, fleeting and it's a temptation to drag his head back up so he could have a fuller taste of him but the other's lips spread warmth throughout him as the light kisses spark tingling along his throat and he swallows hard. He'd never imagined being touched would be so good.
"Ah," Huaisang gasps as the other finds his clit, hips rising just slightly and he grasps the other's shoulder for a moment. Another touching him is just so much more intense than touching himself.
That was Lan Xichen's biggest fear, honestly, when he confessed that he wanted Huaisang - that the other would think he only wanted him now, once what he had been hiding was revealed. That he would not be able to convince him that it was Huaisang that he wanted, that he'd wanted him long before tonight.
His free hand finds Huaisang's, lacing their fingers together and giving his hand a squeeze at that gasp. The way his hips rock up into the touch makes it reasonably clear that it's far from a bad reaction, but he can't help but check in anyway.
"Tell me," he whispers against the hollow of Huaisang's throat. "If it becomes too much."
He settles into a rhythm - thumb circling his clit nice and slow, dragging directly over it every few strokes, and repeating.
Huaisang squeezes the other's hand back, feeling overwhelmed and yet greedy for more at the same time. His eyes are half closed and he lets out a breathy laugh as he lifts his hips against, more insistently.
"Don't stop," Huaisang whispers back and his free hand hesitates before touching along the other's side, he's not as exposed but it doesn't matter. The touch is still intimate enough for him at least for now. He's slowly coming apart at the other's hand.
There's a little huffed laugh of his own in response, breath warm against Huaisang's skin, and he resumes his path, kissing down to his sternum. His hand shifts at the insistent rise of his hips, the fingertips of his first two fingers just barely dipping into his entrance while his thumb speeds up, pressing more firmly over his clit.
"How can I, now that I've had you like this? I'm afraid I will only want more." His lips have stopped at the swell of Huaisang's breast, and he hovers there for a moment so he can look back up at him. "I am selfish, A-Sang, I want to see you overwhelmed with pleasure, to know that I am the one who has given it to you."
Huaisang feels anticipation building just as much as the pleasure was. He whimpers as the fingers tease the entrance while the thumb works him more and the intensity of the pleasure has his legs shifting restlessly and his hand tightening on the other's side. His face is flushing and his pupils are a bit blown as he looks back at Xichen, breathing heavily.
"You're doing a good job then," Huaisang mumbles, reaching up to the other's neck and urging him to keep going with his kisses, arching his back intentionally this time to draw attention to his breasts and that he wanted more. "You'll undo me completely at this rate," he murmurs, probably more than once with as quickly as he feels the way his body is starting to tense and he's so close.
Oh, Huaisang makes the most delicious sounds like this, the way he whimpers and pants, and Lan Xichen's reasonably sure he isn't ever going to be able to get enough of him. When he shifts restlessly, it makes him want to see him writhe in pleasure, when he tightens his grip on him, he wants - oh, he wants it to leave a mark.
"Good." His voice is low and heated, his own breath ragged.
There's a hum of satisfaction as he moves where Huaisang urges him to go, mouthing up his breast to his nipple. He laves it with the flat of his tongue for a moment before drawing the nub between his lips, sucking gently at the same time as he flicks his tongue at the tip.
Huaisang has never heard Xichen sound like this, never heard his voice full of heat and desire, his breathing like that even when he's been fighting. He always stays collected, calm. He's intrigued to have discovered this side of him, the side that's pushing him to the brink, having him rock his hips into the other's hand as he arches into his mouth.
"Fuck," Huaisang whimpers, nails digging in, grasping where he's holding onto the other at the work of the other's tongue, his nipples getting more taut at the attention.
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no subject
"I want to kiss you," he murmurs. "I want to make you feel good, A-Sang, but I do not want to go where such touch is not welcome. If you allow me - is there anywhere you do not want me to touch?"
no subject
"Today as long as you see me as a man you can touch me anywhere," he murmurs, the other understands him, respects him and Huaisang feels safe right now. There's a moment of hesitation and then he gently takes the other's wrist and guides his hand back to his inner thigh, breathing getting heavier with nerves, with anticipation.
"I trust you."
no subject
His touch is firmer this time, when Huaisang guides him back, more purposeful as he strokes up the inside of his thigh.
"Then today I will touch you everywhere, and tomorrow I will ask you the same question, understanding the answer may be different."
His fingers brush against Huaisang's folds, running over them by feel alone, since he can't take his eyes away from the other's face.
"And I will do the same the day after that, and the day after that, and every day for as long as you will have me."
no subject
Then those fingers find the soft folds and Huaisang moans softly, his eyes closing for a moment as he allows the pleasure of being touched by another -- by Xichen -- to rush over him.
There's a smile as Huaisang looks at the other, breathing out shakily.
"Thank you."
no subject
"Thank you," he murmurs. "For trusting me with this. I have wanted you for a very long time."
He kisses him again, just the barest brush of his lips against Huaisang's, and then he drags them over his chin and down the underside of his jaw, planting small kisses all along the line of his throat. At the same time, his hand gently parts Huaisang's folds so he can explore deeper, fingertips gentle over the wet heat of him until they find his clit and press with a little more intention.
no subject
"Ah," Huaisang gasps as the other finds his clit, hips rising just slightly and he grasps the other's shoulder for a moment. Another touching him is just so much more intense than touching himself.
no subject
His free hand finds Huaisang's, lacing their fingers together and giving his hand a squeeze at that gasp. The way his hips rock up into the touch makes it reasonably clear that it's far from a bad reaction, but he can't help but check in anyway.
"Tell me," he whispers against the hollow of Huaisang's throat. "If it becomes too much."
He settles into a rhythm - thumb circling his clit nice and slow, dragging directly over it every few strokes, and repeating.
no subject
"Don't stop," Huaisang whispers back and his free hand hesitates before touching along the other's side, he's not as exposed but it doesn't matter. The touch is still intimate enough for him at least for now. He's slowly coming apart at the other's hand.
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"How can I, now that I've had you like this? I'm afraid I will only want more." His lips have stopped at the swell of Huaisang's breast, and he hovers there for a moment so he can look back up at him. "I am selfish, A-Sang, I want to see you overwhelmed with pleasure, to know that I am the one who has given it to you."
no subject
"You're doing a good job then," Huaisang mumbles, reaching up to the other's neck and urging him to keep going with his kisses, arching his back intentionally this time to draw attention to his breasts and that he wanted more. "You'll undo me completely at this rate," he murmurs, probably more than once with as quickly as he feels the way his body is starting to tense and he's so close.
no subject
"Good." His voice is low and heated, his own breath ragged.
There's a hum of satisfaction as he moves where Huaisang urges him to go, mouthing up his breast to his nipple. He laves it with the flat of his tongue for a moment before drawing the nub between his lips, sucking gently at the same time as he flicks his tongue at the tip.
no subject
"Fuck," Huaisang whimpers, nails digging in, grasping where he's holding onto the other at the work of the other's tongue, his nipples getting more taut at the attention.